Anesthesiologist business card:
When you care enough to sleep with the very best.
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
'Dr. Jones, at your cervix'
In a Podiatrist's office:
'Time wounds all heels.
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
At a Proctologist's door:
'To expedite your visit please back in'
On a Plumber's truck:
'We repair what your husband fixed'
On another Plumber's truck:
'Don't sleep with a drip....Call your plumber'
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
'Invite us to your next blowout'
At a Towing company:
'We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows'
On an Electrician's truck:
'Let us remove your shorts'
In a Non-smoking Area:
'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate
action'
On a Maternity Room door:
'Push. Push. Push'
At an Optometrist's Office:
'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right
place'
On a Taxidermist's window:
'We really know our stuff'
On a Fence:
'Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!'
At a Car Dealership
'The best way to get back on your feet -
miss a car payment'
Outside a Muffler Shop:
'No appointment necessary. We hear you coming'
In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
'Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
At the Electric Company
'We would be delighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don't, you will be'
In a Restaurant window:
'Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up'
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
'Drive carefully. We'll wait'
At a Propane Filling Station:
'Thank heaven for little grills'
And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop:
'Best place in town to take a leak'